end of all things
by intoxicatedclarity
Summary: "destiny is a funny thing." the right kind of love, at the wrong time. two intertwined souls are given a number of lives to find each other. 6 times they meet, 6 lives where fate slowly tries to bind them together. reincarnation AU, jeankasa.
1. the purge and the pale

sooo this is my first fanfic, ya. more to come soonnn

let me know what you think!

warning: there is death here. if you're not comfortable with that, then go check out other amazing jeankasa fics. xx

* * *

The first time Jean sees her, his mind immediately focuses on her jet black hair and smoky eyes. It was a combination of both beauty and fearlessness, how she stood with a kind of power and how her eyes seemed to penetrate into his soul. He doesn't understand how she does it, but he does know that she is not wanted here. Not in this place.

She comes to his small cabin on a cold winter night, in the midst of one of the most cruel battles humanity has ever fought. Jean has mostly kept to himself ever since the war began, having stayed inside his cabin most of the winter and only coming out to get the necessary items at the market a few miles away.

He thinks he is safe for now, until she comes.

* * *

She storms into his house, assuming it was abandoned, only to find him sitting at his desk. The pale woman immediately assumes a fighting stance, but he holds his hands up in defense.

"Whoa, now," he stands up slowly, and her stance only tightens. "I'm not going to hurt you."

"Don't come any closer." she commands.

He stands still, watching her closely. He notices the hair, eyes, skin tone, every little detail he needed to know about the mysterious lady.

And that was when Jean realized what she was.

"You-" he takes a step towards her, and she doesn't loosen up. "You're an oriental."

"I said, don't come any closer!" she reiterates, her tiny fists clenching. She seemed experienced in whatever she was attempting to do, with the threatening and the way she stood.

What had she gone through to make her like this?

"Please, let me help you." he holds a hand out towards her, inviting her to come closer if she dared.

Jean notices a slight shift in the way she held herself, but then the moment passes, and she is back to her cold aura. "I don't trust you. You're going to kill me."

"No," he says. "I would never." He was not that kind of man.

"How would I know that?" she asks.

He understands her caution, stepping closer towards her. "I am just a man hiding from a war."

Reluctantly, she steps closer to him. "You know what I am. So just kill me already."

"I cannot kill another human."

"You know that's not how you feel about me." He could practically hear the venom in her voice as she spoke. "My time is near, anyway. So why don't you just get it over with?"

She was right. She was an oriental, she was exotic, she was one of them. Death was coming for her, and humanity was fighting against her kind. She was lost, and everyone and everything was after her and her people.

Jean looks at her. Really looks at her. The way she trembled in fear even though she acted far from being scared. The way her eyes gleamed, but not from happiness. The way she was looking at him in desperation, as if to say _please help me_.

"I can't." he stares down at the frail woman. "I cannot kill you."

Another moment passes, a pregnant silence falling between them, before she finally breaks down.

She loosens her fists, lowering them and slumping over. Jean doesn't know how to explain what he sees as she reveals what is hidden behind her mask.

The woman, beautiful yet weak, takes another step towards him, her head lowered. She refuses to look up at him, for reasons he didn't know.

"What is your name?" he suddenly asks.

She doesn't answer, instead slipping her hand over his.

They both knew it was a ridiculous question to ask.

* * *

He refuses to let her sleep on the floor, and so they settle on his bed, their sides facing opposite ends of the room and their faces turned away. It is awkward and uncomfortable, but Jean knows this won't last long anyway.

A day passes in peace, and he wishes he could get more time. More time to get to know the beautiful woman, more time to watch her move in all the grace he didn't think a human could possess.

He doesn't acknowledge the way his heart skips a beat every time her gray eyes glance at him, or the way he suddenly feels hot when her body shifts towards his whilst she sleeps. There is no time for them to be something, no time for them to even speak.

Jean tries not to think about what she is, and instead focuses on her, and only her.

* * *

They come for her in the middle of the night.

His door is knocked down by a group of three men, storming into his cabin with as much ruckus as a herd of horses. Jean doesn't expect any less of the swines. He knew this was bound to happen.

Two men go for her, gripping her arms and preventing her from escaping. She is struggling and screaming curse words at the men, but she is met with ignorance.

He couldn't do anything but watch.

"Do you love the oriental?" the man asks as he grasps the neck of the woman, the woman who has no name in his mind.

He feels a punch in the gut. "No." he chokes out.

"Good," the man punches her square in the jaw, and he closes his eyes quickly. "Then let's finish what we came here for."

He reminds himself that he is not that kind of man.

"_Savages!_" he hears her scream. "You are all savages!"

Jean hears the snap, and he opens his eyes to see a limp figure before him. He doesn't even react, instead looking straight at the disheveled body.

All he sees is black.

He didn't even know her name.


	2. the rumor and the wall

hi i'm back again

i felt inspired, so i posted this even though i haven't gotten reviews or anything yet. and also because i've been listening to the 1975 and i feel like i can do anything.

also, in case you're confused: each chapter is a different era. pretty much a new au each ch. (this is reincarnation yo)

enjoy xx

* * *

If Mikasa was anything at all, she was a keen listener.

She didn't hesitate to tune in on conversations that usually weren't meant for her, always wanting to know what was happening in their small town. It was the only place she had ever known in her short life, and in her 13 years, she had learned more things from eavesdropping than from what her parents had taught.

So it wasn't a surprise when she had found out about the "giants."

There were talks of enormous, naked men, up to more than 10 meters tall, towering over the human race and devouring anybody that came across their path. The world was becoming more dangerous, and the news of these so-called "titans" was enough to scare the town as each day passed.

But Mikasa was a clear thinker. She knew these rumors were false, too embellished with ridiculous scenarios. She refused to think that the stories were real.

As time went on, she began to hear more news of the giant men. The news that they were heading closer to her town stuck with her, slowly developing in her mind and keeping her tossing in her bed late at night,

And even though she told herself that it was all just talk, deep down, she knew it wasn't.

Yet her stubbornness still clung to her beliefs. That no, they weren't real. It was just gossip. Just a hoax.

Just rumors.

* * *

She was walking around in the marketplace when she heard it.

"Have you heard about the walls?" the voice-notably male-asked.

"You mean those walls that everyone wants to go see?" the other voice questioned.

She heard a snort. "Yep," A sigh. "Those walls."

She recognized the voice now-it was the beige-haired boy from the vegetable stand, who's name she still didn't know. Mikasa often conversed with him whenever she visited, always giving him a small smile every time she passed.

The boy was the same height as her, not to mention good looking, but she pushed that thought to the back of her mind.

"Man, what I would give to go live there!" this one was another village boy, although she had never associated with him.

She turned slightly to see the two boys standing by the vegetable stand.

"Apparently the walls are supposed to protect us from the titans." the young boy said, and Mikasa tried to hold back a scowl. She made her way over to the stand and proceeded to grab a few cabbages and carrots, all while still listening to their conversation.

"Do you even think the titans are real?" the village boy asked.

She heard a snicker. "Of course they are." he voiced with a tone of snarkiness.

In that moment, Mikasa decided to butt in, tired of listening to this nonsense.

"How would you know?" she asked the two, surprising them both as they noticed her.

The hazel eyed boy looked at her with wide eyes, as if he had been shocked back into reality, and began to stutter. "Oh uh-h-hey there-"

Mikasa held up a hand, and he closed his mouth instantly. "How would you know?" she asked again.

He stared at her in awe, bright eyes watching her in a way that made her awkwardly look away from his gaze.

"Well?" she asks.

He clears his throat, attempting to gather himself together. "Well," he crosses his arms. "Haven't you listened around town? Surely you've heard about how horrible they are."

"Indeed, I have." Of course she has. Does he not know her?

He raised a brow. "And you don't believe any of the rumors?"

She shook her head, confirming that no, she didn't believe them, not at all.

The boy tilted his head to the side. "Then you don't think the walls are real, either?"

Mikasa met his stare, effectively making him flinch. "None of the things we've heard are true." She deadpanned.

Silence fell over them, and the boy tugged at his collar nervously, looking away from her. "You don't know that." he said.

"Rumors are rumors until proven true," she stated. "We've never seen the walls nor the titans."

"True," the boy claimed. "But I still know for sure the walls are real."

Mikasa ended up dropping all the food she had managed to gather into her arms, for she was appalled that he was _still_ going at it.

"In fact," he added. "I'm going to see them for myself."

Her eyes widened. "Oh really?"

"Yep," he smirked at her. "My family and I are going to leave this place before the titans come. We're not waiting to be killed by a bunch of monsters."

Mikasa had to fight the urge to roll her eyes. _The nerve of this boy._

"Well, if you find the walls to be as sacred as you think they are, why don't you just leave now?" she said.

The boy looked at her now, not knowing what to say. She kept her eyes on him, refusing to look away, for reasons she didn't know.

He always stared at her, no matter what was going on around them, and she always felt small under his gaze. But she couldn't feel like that right now. Not now, when he was going against what she understood.

"What if I did?" he asked her abruptly.

Mikasa was at a loss of words. What if he did leave? Would he really go to a place that was only talked about in whispers and grimaces?

The vegetables that she had dropped still laid on the ground below them, but neither had acknowledged them and continued focusing on the other.

"You would come back." she claimed, crossing her arms.

"I would?" his eyes widened in challenge.

"You would."

"And why would I?"

"Because-" she swept her hair back, subtly noticing the way he watched her hair flip back before meeting her eyes again. "Because it's not real, and you would realize that you were stupid to believe such a thing."

He nervously laughed at her statement, and she stood there stiffly. _It's all just gossip._

"Alright, then." he stepped closer to her then. "If I do come back, I'll tell you you were right."

His hand went for hers, fingers coming into contact. Mikasa suddenly felt a sensation, a small jolt of _something_, and felt him grabbing her wrist. She tried to pull back quickly, but his grip was firm.

His hand slid down to grasp hers, and she felt her heartbeat quicken in anticipation of whatever was ensuing between them.

He slowly brought her hand up to his face, and she could already feel the hint of a blush spreading across her face. His lips brushed against the back of her hand, showing her a side of him, a side that was hidden behind the nervousness she had associated him with. She immediately pulled her hand out of his grasp, reaching up to her crimson scarf and lifting it over her cheeks, hiding her flushed face from him. He smirked again.

Mikasa buried herself behind her scarf, avoiding eye contact with the boy before her. There is a small silence between them, slowly digesting what had just happened.

He cleared his throat after another moment, bringing them back to reality.

"I doubt I'll come back." he looked down at her. "Not back to this town."

A small smile hid behind her scarf. "Sure you won't." she said.

But of course, Mikasa knew that he wouldn't.

* * *

She came back to the marketplace the next day to see that he wasn't standing by the vegetable stand.

A day after, and still no sign of him.

And it was like that the next day.

And the next day.

And the next.

Mikasa knew that he had left, and she was somewhat disappointed. She didn't think he would really leave, let alone leave her hanging like that. After all the times they had talked, she didn't even get a proper goodbye.

Or a proper name.

But Mikasa refused to dwell on it. They had barely known each other anyway.

As months passed, warnings were being sent and as the titans multiplied, so did the terror and fear. Eventually her town had to evacuate and her family fled. News of nearby villages being attacked by the giants came, and it came to a point where it was just her on the run, looking for safety that was nowhere to be found. Her previous mindset was suddenly replaced by panic and horror.

Danger was always around the corner, and no one knew whether their last day would be today or the next.

Mikasa never got the chance to see him again, never got the chance to tell him that he was right.

The titans were real. They were real and she was a fool for never believing the boy by the stand.

What a blind fool she had been.

* * *

why yes it is possible to be 13 years old and have a boy kiss your hand. at least for mikasa, it is.

ALSO SORRY FOR MORE ANGST AND BAD FEELS ALL AROUND. IT'LL GET BETTER IN TIME I PROMISE

let me know what you think!


End file.
